Warning, graphic depiction follows.
I ate a 4-kilo (9-pound) durian all by myself tonight. It was like ripping into the womb of a long-dead reptilian alien and eating the rotten, yet sweet and creamy fetus… with a hint of custard, garlic and almonds. I'm not sure how or even what made me do it. But I'm already regretting it 30 minutes later, along with everyone in sensory range. Its like giving birth to twin dragons that are already flame-throwing before they even clear the womb. Its like the Wizard of Oz when it changes from black and white to technicolor, with James Cameron 3D and George Lucas THX surround sound. If you were here, I'll bet you could taste it too.
…and I'll bet tomorrow I'll do it all over again.